Embracing My Mom Body

I knew that my body would never be the same after having a baby, but I wasn't prepared for just how different it would be. Even the texture of my skin is different--even the skin on my arms. It's drier and ...just different. And then there is my belly and my inner thighs. There is nothing to say about those parts of my body except that they make me look like a mom. Not just any mom. MY mom. Ugh. (No offense, Mom) And then my boobs--don't even get me started. I used to have super cute boobs. TMI? Too bad. Now, they are just lame. And slightly smaller. I thought they were supposed to get bigger, but not mine. I have a huge, weird belly offset by smaller, saggy boobs. The crazy extra skin on my belly is unreal. And stretch marks? Blah. Nothing I can do about that, so I have decided to embrace the new me. A little fatter, a little older, a little drier, a little saggier, but that doesn't matter. I can buy more lotion and just learn to deal with the rest. I can't look 20 forever--and who would want to live with all that pressure?

So, in an effort to just get out and be confident, I bought a new swimsuit--for the first time in 10 years. Unreal, really. It's so cute. I had to buy it from two different companies, because I really wanted boyshorts and the company that sold the top I wanted didn't have boyshorts as an option, so as a result, the browns of the top and bottom are slightly different. I'll just embrace that, too. I deserved a new swimsuit. I got rid of my old ones a couple months ago after trying them on again and seeing they were too big. I can't figure out how they were too big--I'm pretty much the same size except for my mom belly, which is bigger--but still, it looked like I was wearing my big sister's suit. So I decided to buy a new two-piece with a swimskirt coverup. Adorable! I can't wait to actually wear it other than trying it on. That is a BIG plus--I haven't felt that way since before I was pregnant. But so what if I have a weird belly? It'll be covered up so you can't see all the little stretchies on it. And even if you could see the saggy stretchies--I will love me no matter what. But it's still hard--for 30 years, I looked basically lean and suddenly, I just don't. But a cute new swimsuit helps with the hurt.

Here we come, Summer! I'm ready for anything now! Hooray!